I am not quite certain if I am to be considered too old to read, let alone enjoy the Harry Potter novels. Tell me, is a full grown woman even allowed to know of Harry Potter?
If you have read any one of the series, you might recall the pensieve. The pensieve is a receptacle into which are stored the memories of Professor Dumbledore, from which the memories could be retrieved almost-at-will. I dare say that unless you are a member of the Air Force, and I do not mean the Royal Air Force, such a device is probably out of your altitude.
I was rummaging through an old wardrobe of mine- an archive of sorts if you will. It contains old love letters, cards, and diaries of a time when the extent of my worries was whether my body would ever, please God, catch up with my burgeoning breasts. Incidentally, it did… eventually! Oh, and pictures, pictures, and more pictures!!! From the moment I found out that I was photogenic, I just could not resist taking pictures- as my collection would testify.
Anyway, these pictures (along with my other prized possessions in my archives), they are my pensieve. Each one has its own story- stories told by the backdrops, the smiles (or faltering smiles, depending …), the clothes, the postures, the hairstyles. There has been dependence, innocence, the first stirrings of love, uncertainty, confidence, friendship, weariness … the list goes on and on. In parts, I want to cry, laugh out loud, smile a knowing smile, scream, sigh… My heart would be light and/or heavy depending on the picture. Sometimes a wish that one or two things could have turned out differently- for me and for those I love; but mostly, gratitude for the way things have turned out and are turning out. Memories of more carefree times.
As yet, I really don’t know how to classify ‘now’ in my life. Perhaps some day, they will be carefree times. I don’t know whether to hope they will be, would it mean that ‘then’ will not be carefree times? Does it even matter?
All I know is this: I miss people. I miss times. I miss me.
If you have read any one of the series, you might recall the pensieve. The pensieve is a receptacle into which are stored the memories of Professor Dumbledore, from which the memories could be retrieved almost-at-will. I dare say that unless you are a member of the Air Force, and I do not mean the Royal Air Force, such a device is probably out of your altitude.
I was rummaging through an old wardrobe of mine- an archive of sorts if you will. It contains old love letters, cards, and diaries of a time when the extent of my worries was whether my body would ever, please God, catch up with my burgeoning breasts. Incidentally, it did… eventually! Oh, and pictures, pictures, and more pictures!!! From the moment I found out that I was photogenic, I just could not resist taking pictures- as my collection would testify.
Anyway, these pictures (along with my other prized possessions in my archives), they are my pensieve. Each one has its own story- stories told by the backdrops, the smiles (or faltering smiles, depending …), the clothes, the postures, the hairstyles. There has been dependence, innocence, the first stirrings of love, uncertainty, confidence, friendship, weariness … the list goes on and on. In parts, I want to cry, laugh out loud, smile a knowing smile, scream, sigh… My heart would be light and/or heavy depending on the picture. Sometimes a wish that one or two things could have turned out differently- for me and for those I love; but mostly, gratitude for the way things have turned out and are turning out. Memories of more carefree times.
As yet, I really don’t know how to classify ‘now’ in my life. Perhaps some day, they will be carefree times. I don’t know whether to hope they will be, would it mean that ‘then’ will not be carefree times? Does it even matter?
All I know is this: I miss people. I miss times. I miss me.
1 comment:
YES, YES, YES, a FULL GROWN WOMAN/ MAN is allowed to read Harry Potter....
I love this post,...I can so relate to it from Air Force to Potter references to reminiscing on times past....
The last sentence gets me.."i miss people, I miss times, I miss me"....
Little wonder I find myself coming back to this particular blog post over and over again...
p.S: YuP, u're photogenic
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