Monday, September 17, 2007

Land of the Absurd and the Not-so-Absurd


This picture here, regardless of what you think, is the not-so-absurd. And I should know; after all, I am the one telling the tales here. Aren’t these guys just amazing? As if it is not enough that they are flouting every unwritten safety and traffic rule there is- rider, passenger, and three rams, all on one okada (it almost makes me want to pen a nursery rhyme) - they are smiling!!! I wonder what there is to grin about. Something about the dogged, indefatigable, indomitable, spirit of the Nigerian? Maybe. Or excitement at being photographed? I really can’t tell.

Now on to today’s entree- the ABSURD. The spotlight has been on one of Nigeria’s northern states in recent times. Normally, the northern governors aren’t news worthy. They have neither the clout, resources, nor panache to pull off many of the antics their southern counterparts get up to. But this is a new regime, and it seems like they are upping the ante.

We had heard from the get-go of an ongoing battle in Adamawa State for the position of first lady. That ordinarily would fall under the not-so-absurd. After all, this is Nigeria, and it would not be the first time that the chief executive of a State or maybe the entire nation would have a pool from which to pick a first lady. In the instant case, Governor Nyako is totally maxed out on his Islamic allocation of four wives. And therein lies his dilemma. Each of his wives for some reason believes herself the rightful candidate to the throne of first lady and is ready to fight to the death to stake her claim.

The situation is simultaneously hilarious and pitiful. Hilarious because the genius Chief of Staff rather than risk the wrath of 3 scorned women (and you know how it is with even one scorned woman) recently decided to simply make all four of them First Ladies. One of them will be first lady in charge of Abuja affairs, another first lady of health matters, yet another first lady of political affairs, and the last but by no means the least the first lady of home affairs. And I kid you not.

It is pitiful because at least two of these women are high achievers- one a High Court judge in Abuja (the current first lady in charge of Abuja affairs) while another is a medical doctor (no prices for guessing her portfolio) and they have reduced themselves to this … crudity! Even more pitiful is the fact that the good citizens of Adamawa State have to watch as the meager resources that should be used to upgrade their welfare will be inevitably siphoned to perpetuate the four first ladies in a lifestyle to which they wish to become accustomed.

I am not aware of any manual out there which deals with how to handle tricky situations like this, so I totally understand how it would look like the governor is stumped. But I have a wonderful idea. Maybe we should consider holding fresh elections. I can just see the headlines: INEC Holds Fresh Elections for the Office of the First Lady in Adamawa State.

4 comments:

Unbiased said...

Absurd ke? You must have been out of the country too long girl. nothing surprises me 'bout nigeria anymore. Sadly these days such things are the 'cause of amusement. Nigerians have always had the choice of laughter or tears during our intense struggle and guess what? We choose to laugh and move on with life. lol!!

Unbiased said...

oh and i noticed you changed your blog layout. This one is nicer (wink wink)

babeandahalf said...

thanks- i thought i needed to brighten my layout a bit. out of nigeria ke? i am right in the thick of nigerian absurdity o!!!

Moumi said...

Your Lordships are flesh and blood afterall..!

Its hillarious to think
that ...ehm.. the exalted Justice Binta is actuyally in the middle of mundane domestic squabbles... wonderful!

its a man's world any which way o!